After growing up in a rural Illinois town, a few things awaken my pride in the Midwest: ranch dressing, Culver’s custard, and Kum & Go. While Kum & Go may seem like a gas station with a silly name, it has been a vital — if not goofy — part of me growing up. You can imagine how distraught I was when I heard my dear Midwest gas station was bought out and would have its name changed.
Now, you may be wondering: what is so special about a gas station chain? To that, I say, everything! First, let’s address the elephant in the room: the name. According to the Kum & Go website, the name is a combination of the founders’ names: W.A. Krause and T.S. Gentle. The website also states that “the name Kum & Go was more than just a quirky moniker combining our founders’ initials; it was a promise to serve customers quickly and efficiently, allowing them to get on with their journey.” Are you kidding me? They are able to spin a silly goofy name like Kum & Go into that beautiful, moving mission statement. Iconic! I personally don’t find the name too dirty; when you say it out loud it’s hardly raunchy at all. Even if it is too inappropriate, it’s funny! It is one of the silly and simple pleasures of driving down the Midwest interstate. After hours and hours of driving, I pass a Kum & Go, have a giggle, and suddenly I am revitalized to continue on my journey. Also, it means they get to call their fans “Kummies.” Come on, how funny is that?
Aside from that, Kum & Go has great food! The ampersand donuts are adorable — and tasty. Have you ever had a Kum & Go slushie on a warm summer day? It is unmatched! I remember going to Kum & Go with my sister and brother to get slushies — and a roller hotdog for Owen — after the last day of school. Kum & Go: bringing families together. The ambiance in all of the Kum & Gos I have been in is not bad at all, which is a real feat for a gas station. And the gas isn’t too expensive, which is a plus.
The real thing that sells me on Kum & Go is their social media. They are active on Instagram and TikTok, posting memes, deals, and merch. Kum & Go’s memes are brand marketing at its finest. Also, they do frequent, fun giveaways! I have won two giveaways: a tote bag for seniors graduating high school during the pandemic and a winter jacket. The winter jacket is honestly the nicest jacket I have. Thanks, Kum & Go! Their dedication to fun and silly things is truly admirable. Kum & Go is also notorious for their Kum & Gay Rights pride merch. Allies!
My biggest fear with the Kum & Go takeover is the change in vibe. Firstly, FJ Management will change all the names to “Maverik” by 2025. The Utah-based Maggelet family that owns FJ Management originally planned to rebrand only the Kum & Go locations in Maverik territory, but later decided to change all stores because of concern about the double entendre of the Kum & Go name. So you’re coming into my silly little Midwest town and changing my silly little gas station because of a sex joke. Kum on, dude! If they are worried about the name, what are they going to do with the other silly parts? Ampersand donut: gone! Kum & Gay Rights pride merch: gone! Tweets from Kum & Go that say “Live, laugh, and get some gas”: gone!
Kum & Go’s only crime was being a little silly in a serious, adventure-themed gas station store — cough, cough Maverik — world. By rebranding Kum & Go, FJ Management has removed one of the few joys in life and gone one step closer to a soulless, harsh overhead lighting gas station world. What’s next, making fun illegal? The best way to honor Kum & Go is to get merch before they pull them from the shelves, enjoy a slushie, and make a silly joke. Good night sweet prince, you were too good for this world.
Phoebe Joy is from Illinois City, Ill.
Their majors are English, Gender & Sexuality Studies, and Music.